Mastering Camp Discipline: A Counselor's Guide to Effective Camper Behavior Management

Being a camp counselor is a rewarding experience, filled with fun, learning, and the chance to make a positive impact on children’s lives. However, it also comes with its challenges, and one of the most common is managing camper behavior and maintaining discipline. Many counselors, especially those new to the role, might feel unsure about how to effectively handle disciplinary situations. If you’re feeling this way, know that you’re not alone.

This guide is designed to equip you with the knowledge and strategies you need to become a confident and effective disciplinarian at summer camp. We’ll explore what discipline truly means in a camp setting, how to establish clear expectations, understand camper motivations, and resolve conflicts constructively. By understanding these principles, you can create a safe, fun, and enriching environment where campers thrive.

Defining Discipline: More Than Just Punishment

It’s crucial to understand that discipline is not simply about punishment. While punishment might be a part of discipline, the concept is much broader. Think of discipline as training – it’s about guiding, shaping, and correcting behavior. Webster’s Dictionary defines discipline as “training that perfects, molds, or corrects.” In this sense, discipline is a systematic approach that encompasses setting policies, communicating rules, and implementing consequences.

At camp, just like in any community or organization, rules and policies are in place to support the well-being and safety of everyone. They are designed for the common good, not just individual preferences.

The Power of Shared Rule-Making

A key principle in effective discipline is camper involvement in rule creation. A sign in many camp offices wisely states that in safe spaces, “There are rules… they are few and fair and made by the people who live there, including the children.” This highlights a vital point: people are more likely to support rules they helped create.

Giving campers a voice in establishing policies and procedures, even if they don’t always agree with every rule, fosters a sense of ownership and responsibility. They become more invested in following guidelines they had a hand in shaping. Seasoned disciplinarians know that children can often be stricter with themselves than adults might expect. Involve campers in setting rules for cabins, activities, and free time – you might be surprised by their thoughtful contributions.

Of course, certain rules, particularly those related to health and safety, are non-negotiable and must be established by camp leadership. However, even with these essential rules, open dialogue and explanation can help campers understand the reasons behind them and increase compliance.

Drawing from parenting wisdom, consider using a framework similar to the “Mine, Yours, and Ours” decision-making chart. This approach, detailed in Reality Gap, suggests categorizing decisions. “Mine” represents decisions made by counselors (or parents), “Yours” are decisions campers can make independently, and “Ours” are collaborative decisions. As campers demonstrate maturity and responsible choices, the balance can shift from “Mine” to “Ours” and eventually to “Yours,” granting them increasing autonomy. While health and safety decisions should remain firmly in the “Ours” category at camp, this framework provides a valuable model for fostering camper responsibility.

Understanding Counseling Styles: Lessons from Parenting

Just as there are different parenting styles, camp counselors also adopt various approaches to discipline. Understanding these styles, and their impact, can significantly improve your effectiveness. Psychologist Diana Baumrind’s research identifies four primary parenting styles: indulgent, authoritarian, authoritative, and uninvolved. These styles differ based on “demandingness” (how much parents expect and set standards) and “responsiveness” (how warm and supportive parents are).

Reflect on what kind of “counselor-parent” you will be this summer. Your chosen style will directly influence camper behavior.

Indulgent Counselors: These counselors are highly responsive but set few expectations for camper behavior or responsibilities. They are permissive, offering acceptance regardless of actions. With minimal rules, campers under indulgent counselors are often more prone to misbehavior.
Authoritarian Counselors: Authoritarian counselors are high on control and low on responsiveness. They establish strict rules and may react harshly to rule-breaking, but offer little support or warmth. Campers under authoritarian counselors can become anxious, depressed, and socially withdrawn. They may also struggle with independent decision-making, having been primarily told what to do rather than understanding the reasoning behind rules.
Authoritative Counselors: Authoritative counselors strike a balance, being both demanding and responsive. They hold campers accountable for age-appropriate behavior but also engage them in understanding expectations, moving beyond a “my way or the highway” approach. For example, instead of simply saying, “If you’re late for curfew, you’ll be restricted to camp,” an authoritative counselor might explain, “Being late for curfew disrupts cabin routines and causes worry. It’s important to be on time to ensure everyone gets adequate rest and we can start the next day smoothly.”
Uninvolved Counselors: Uninvolved counselors are neither demanding nor responsive. They are detached, offering little guidance, attention, or support. Campers under uninvolved counselors may feel neglected, unloved, and disconnected. This style is essentially ineffective for positive camper development.

Clearly, an authoritative approach is the most effective in fostering positive camper behavior. It combines clear expectations with understanding and support, creating a respectful and growth-oriented environment.

Knowing Your Campers: Decoding Behavior

Understanding your campers as individuals is fundamental to effective discipline. By knowing their personalities, traits, and even habits, you can better understand the motivations behind their actions and anticipate potential behavioral challenges.

The reasons behind camper behavior are diverse. Troubling behavior might stem from:

Attention-seeking: Campers may act out to get noticed.
Anger or frustration: Underlying anger or frustration can manifest in misbehavior.
Physical discomfort: Illness or exhaustion can impact behavior.
Homesickness: Feeling homesick can lead to acting out.
Peer conflict: Disagreements with other campers can trigger negative behaviors.
External stressors: Issues happening at home or in their lives outside of camp, even unknown to counselors, can influence behavior.

While the list of potential motivations is extensive, the deeper your understanding of each camper, the more likely you are to identify the root causes of their behavior and address them effectively. In addition to individual knowledge, understanding age-related developmental characteristics can provide further insights into camper actions.

As Paul Feig, creator of “Freaks and Geeks,” humorously notes, “Childhood is built on bad decision-making. In fact, if it weren’t for all the bad decisions we were constantly carrying out as kids, there’s a good chance that none of us would have figured out all the things we weren’t going to do when we became adults.” While learning from experience is valuable, guiding campers with understanding and knowledge of their developmental stage is even more effective. Counselors who understand how children think, learn, and grow can better help them make positive choices and foster their development.

Ultimately, the relationship you build with your campers is the strongest influence on their behavior. Psychologist Madeline Levine emphasizes this in The Price of Privilege, stating, “Most important, remember that discipline takes place within a parent-child relationship that has a particular ‘feel’ to it. Warm connection forms the foundation and provides the ballast to help our children manage life’s ups and downs. It also makes it much easier for us to be effective disciplinarians. We can learn all kinds of ‘techniques’ for disciplining, but they are bound to fail unless, at heart, we have a loving relationship.”

A strong counselor-camper relationship allows you to anticipate potential conflicts and, crucially, defuse them effectively.

Resolving Conflicts: Turning Challenges into Growth

Conflict is an inherent part of human interaction, and it’s not necessarily negative. Conflict can be a catalyst for understanding different perspectives and ultimately fostering collaboration. The key is not to avoid conflict, but to effectively resolve it.

Unresolved conflicts tend to escalate, so addressing them promptly is essential. Whether conflicts arise between counselors, campers, or between campers and counselors, understanding and resolving them is vital. Here are key principles for effective conflict resolution:

Focus on win-win: Conflict resolution should aim for mutually beneficial outcomes, not winners and losers. Find solutions that address the needs of all parties involved.
Stay present: Avoid bringing up past conflicts or unrelated issues. Focus solely on the current disagreement.
Encourage “I statements”: Promote the use of “I statements” rather than accusatory “You statements.” “You statements” like “You took my book without asking!” often trigger defensiveness. “I statements” express personal feelings without blame, such as “I felt frustrated when I couldn’t find my book because I wanted to read during free time.” Model and encourage campers to express their feelings constructively during conflicts.
Inject humor: Appropriate humor can lighten the mood and ease tension. It can remind everyone of their shared camaraderie and friendship.
Take breaks: If progress stalls or conflict intensifies, take a break. Allow time for emotions to cool down before resuming discussions. Sometimes, stepping away and returning later with fresh perspectives can facilitate resolution.

Managing Behavior: Helpful vs. Unhelpful Approaches

Maintaining discipline is a core counselor responsibility because it creates a safe, enjoyable, and educational environment. Discipline safeguards campers from harassment, bullying, and unsafe situations.

When addressing disciplinary situations, approaches can be categorized as helpful or unhelpful.

Helpful disciplinary approaches correct behavior without making a camper feel threatened, inadequate, or excessively embarrassed. They guide campers to adjust their behavior while fostering self-awareness and understanding of how their actions impact others.

Responding to Rule-Breaking: Staying Calm and Seeking Understanding

Despite the best preparation, campers will sometimes break rules. Reasons can range from simple curiosity about boundaries (“Sometimes you have to run away just to see who runs after you”) to more complex underlying issues.

Your reaction is crucial. The most important advice is to remain calm. If you feel anger rising, take a moment to compose yourself before responding. Reacting in anger can shut down communication and hinder any chance of constructive dialogue. The second crucial step is to give the camper a chance to explain. There may be extenuating circumstances or misunderstandings.

Regarding consequences or punishment, the most effective are those:

Pre-determined: Consequences should ideally be established and communicated in advance, so campers understand the repercussions of rule-breaking.
Reasonable: Punishments should fit the infraction and be proportionate to the offense.
Safe: Punishments should never jeopardize a camper’s physical or psychological well-being. Physical punishment or humiliation are unacceptable. Withholding affection or attention long-term is also detrimental.

While camper behavior can be challenging, reacting with reasoned thought rather than impulsive emotion is essential. Otherwise, your response may create a worse outcome than the initial rule infraction.

The Truth About Lying: Honesty and Accountability

Honesty is a fundamental value in any community, and most ethical codes emphasize it. Children themselves recognize the importance of honesty. A Penn State University study found that 98% of children value trust and honesty in relationships. Yet, paradoxically, the same study revealed that 98% of teenagers admit to lying to their parents.

This disconnect is echoed in anecdotal observations. When fourteen-year-old campers are asked about trust in their relationships with parents, they consistently express its importance. However, a significant portion also admit to lying about their whereabouts and activities. Explanations range from “It’s a game” to “They expect us to lie” or “We’re supposed to lie.”

Studies confirm that lying behavior begins early. By age four, most children will lie to avoid trouble. Throughout childhood and adolescence, avoiding punishment remains a primary motivator for lying. Other reasons include seeking social acceptance, asserting independence, gaining control, or seeking attention. While some lying can be seen as developmentally normative, it can also signal deeper issues.

Interestingly, the Penn State study suggests children often learn to lie by observing parents who lie or bend the truth. Some parents even encourage “white lies” for politeness.

Honesty is directly relevant to discipline because honesty, accountability, and personal responsibility are foundational to effective behavior management. Holding campers to high standards of honesty and integrity is essential, even if truthfulness isn’t always guaranteed.

Dishonesty can be particularly frustrating for disciplinarians, especially within a community emphasizing values. Engage campers in discussions about community values and how honesty contributes to the common good. Help them understand the impact of lying on relationships and trust within the camp community.

Dr. Paul Ekman, a lying expert, highlights the relational aspect of dishonesty: “Typically, the liar does not feel guilty about telling an authorized lie. The liar disrespects the target. Guilt arises only when lying to a respected target.” He further warns that broken trust is difficult to rebuild, undermining relationships.

While avoiding conflict can tempt both children and adults to overlook dishonesty, unaddressed dishonesty breeds more dishonesty, hindering personal growth. As one camper insightfully stated, “I’m a really good liar, and I don’t like who I’m becoming.”

Returning to parenting styles, research shows that parents who are most consistent with rules are also the warmest and most communicative. They set clear rules, explain the reasoning behind them, and expect compliance. In other areas, they foster autonomy and allow children to make their own decisions. This balanced approach mirrors the authoritative counseling style and reinforces the importance of clear rules combined with a supportive relationship.

Remembering the 5 Cs of Discipline

While being a “disciplinarian” might not be the most appealing aspect of being a camp counselor, it’s an integral part of the role. You are, in many ways, stepping in as a guiding figure for campers during the summer.

To create an effective disciplinary system, remember the 5 Cs of Discipline:

Clarify Rules: Establish clear rules and explain the reasons behind them. Rules provide structure and security for campers. Keep rules limited, relevant, and consistently review them. Uniform and consistent enforcement is crucial; inconsistent application undermines rule effectiveness.
Communicate Rules: Clearly communicate rules to campers. They need to understand expectations and generally desire to earn approval and trust. It’s your responsibility to ensure they understand what is expected of them.
Consistent Application: Apply rules consistently. Inconsistency breeds confusion and problems. All counselors must agree on and adhere to a common disciplinary approach. For example, if curfew is 10:00 PM, it must be 10:00 PM for all counselors, not subject to individual interpretation.
Consequences for Broken Rules: Enforce pre-determined consequences when rules are broken. If campers believe consequences are not enforced, they are more likely to misbehave. When possible, link consequences to constructive actions that allow campers to make amends and rebuild trust.
Character Counts: Frame discipline within the context of camp values and community responsibility. Emphasize the importance of character. Highlight how values like honesty and integrity build trust, a cornerstone of all relationships. Help campers connect values, honesty, integrity, and healthy relationships. Reinforce that character truly matters.

As a camp counseling book from the 1950s suggests, a counselor should be someone who enjoys nature and camaraderie. While these qualities remain important, the role in 2024 is more complex, including being a skilled disciplinarian. Mastering camper behavior management can make the summer successful and enjoyable for both you and your campers. It’s a unique opportunity to make a significant, positive difference in children’s lives.

References

American Camp Association. (26 Jan. 2010). www.ACAcamps.org

Anderson, S.A., & Sabatelli, R.M. (2002). Family Interaction: A Multigenerational Developmental Perspective. Boston: Pearson.

Bronson, P. (2008). Learning to Lie. New York Magazine, Feb. 10, 2008: http://nymag.com/ news/features/43893/ (26 Jan. 2010).

Eckman, P. (2009). Is Lying Ever Justifiable? Reading Between the Lies, February 2009, http://www.paulekman.com/wp-content/ uploads/2009/11/Newsletter_FEBRUARY091. pdf (26 Jan. 2010).

Feig, P. (2002). Kick Me: Adventures in Adolescence. New York: Three Rivers Press.

Levine, M. (2006). The Price of Privilege. New York: HarperCollins.

Search Institute. (2009). 40 Developmental Assets for Children Grades K-3, http://www.searchinstitute. org/system/files/40AssetsK-3.pdf (26 Jan. 2010).

Wallace, S. (2009). An Introduction to Camp Counseling. Boston: Summit.

Wallace, S. (2008). Reality Gap. New York: Union Square Press/Sterling Publishing.

Stephen Wallace, M.S. Ed., author of the book Reality Gap: Alcohol, Drugs, and Sex — What Parents Don’t Know and Teens Aren’t Telling, has broad experience as a school psychologist and motivational speaker. He serves as chairman and CEO of SADD, director of counseling and counselor training at the Cape Cod Sea Camps, and adjunct professor of psychology at Mount Ida College. For more information about Wallace’s work, visit www.stephengraywallace.com.

Originally published in the 2010 May/June issue of Camping Magazine.

The views and opinions expressed by contributors are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views of the American Camp Association or ACA employees.